The evening in the desert is always the most depressing. All the hopes of a spectacular day are gone, nothing left to do except to think about how it could have been better. Its a tragedy really. I know I'm going to exit the desert at night. It makes total sense. Maybe because it is dark, and there is nothing else to do, nothing left to prove. I hate this time of day. In the desert. My eyes are burning and there is a deliciousness to closing the lids over them. I wish I could sleep but I know I would just wind up laying there listening to my heartbeat quicken. Where is God? Is the war over? Is there really any point anymore. And than I start to question myself "Have I really ever been good at anything at all?" "Am I crazy"
"Who else would think like that'
"Maybe the desert would be better off without me"
"I am lonely because nobody really know me"
"I am lonely because I don't want to be known"
The desert in the evening is a cruel mistress. She will act like she wants you but than pull away when you go to pick her up.
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